When I was in first grade, I learned that apple trees grew from the little seeds inside the apple. I decided to plant several of them in my yard, and dreamed of picking the fruit from my very own apple tree.
I was disheartened when I saw only a tiny sprout after many days, which was soon mown down (unintentionally) by my dad because it was too small to recognize.
My adult piano students usually quit when they realized how long it would take them to be able to play well.
Parents become frustrated and continually seek new ways of parenting because they expect children to change behavior after being corrected twice.
Only weeds grow fast.
You are cultivating adult humans. You started with the tiniest of seeds, and have already gone through a very difficult process to bring them into this world, so it's understandable to feel as though you've paid your dues and deserve a break.
But guess what? That's not going to happen.
Ready or not, when you sign up to be a parent, it's for the long haul. You've been given an actual human to bring up, with all of the responsibility that goes along with that, from providing food, clothing, and shelter, and formal education, to providing things that ultimately matter even more: an understanding of how to relate to God, other people, themselves, and the world.
Sticking with the plant analogy, the things that grow the fastest and most naturally (weeds) tend to be the things we need to get rid of so that the plant (child) can have adequate water and sunshine, and eventually bear fruit.
We have to weed out the natural selfishness, destructiveness, and narcissism in order to cultivate a plant (person) whose roots go deep into healthy, rich soil, and who has full access to the full rays of the sun.
Growth is slow. Plants (children) require consistent tending. Growth is sometimes dormant, but even then important things are going on under the surface.
We, the parent-gardeners have to make sure our little plants have access to good soil and full sun. We need to water them, nurture them, weed the soil they're growing in, and prune them as necessary. We have to protect them from harsh weather, and replenish nutrients in the soil from time to time.
You get the picture; their growth is slow, and until they are well-established, it's up to us to do whatever it takes, in good conditions or hard ones, to make sure they have what they need to become strong, in every way,
Remember who you are and what your job is. You're the gardener. The job is long and hard, but you can do it if you have the tools and know how to use them.
If you don't, contact me. Sign up for a free call, (click the button) a free webinar, or buy a parenting course. You can do this! It's the most important thing you will EVER do.